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As boomer women we have so many tasks, projects and events that we sometimes  forget to take time for ourselves.  On Saturday, I took some time to watch a movie on TV.  The name of the movie is Clear and Present Danger.  This movie shows what happens when people you trust practice deception.  The deception is so covert that you have no idea about what’s really going on.

Naturally, I started thinking about how we as individuals practice self deception.  Self deception, sometimes called self sabotage is more devastating than deception from others.  Watching the movie, I noticed the amount of time spent by the deceivers on putting their projects first, securing the necessary manpower and equipment to make the project go smoothly.

Many times we set goals, develop a plan of action and begin implementation.  Of course, we put our projects first; secure the necessary equipment and materials to make the project go smoothly.  Some where along the way of implementation we start to question the ease with which the project is moving.  Once we start this path, we almost immediately start to find something wrong or other ways to slow the process.  Could this be self deception the beginning of self sabotage?

Old thought patterns begin to trigger old unsuccessful behaviors which lead to asking questions that surely derail the successful process already started.  We start to ask “what if…”  Once the “what if…” questions arise, it’s not long until the whole project seems fruitless.  Could this be fear that we might succeed?

And then, just like in the movie, along comes an honest person who reveals the deception for what it is.  This is the person we trust, our support person, the person who now sees our self deception and reveals it to us.  This person encourages us and empowers us to go on.   This support person helps us reevaluate our plan, helps us renegotiate and restart our implementation.  This is the person who ALWAYS believes in us even when we don’t believe in ourselves.

So, boomer women, taking time for ourselves doesn’t necessarily mean engaging in mindless activity.  Even though watching a movie can be considered mindless by some however by others there’s great value to be found.

Can you think of a time when self deception and/or self sabotage derailed you?  What did you do about it?

Can you think of a time when you were the support person revealing the self deception and/or self sabotage?  How did that work for the other person?

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